Part 7 - The Past

“He said what?” Cynthia could barely believe her ears when I told her what happened before Dany offered me the job. “Honey, you know I was the one to push you into that meeting, but you need to be smart about this. Do I need to remind you about Adrian?”

Adrian is an ex boyfriend. He used to be part of a fairly famous band that quickly abused their fame and then split up due to character differences. Adrian and I started pretty much the same way I met Dany, only I was much younger and needed much less to be much more impressed.

Back then I was head over heels in love with Adrian. He would spend every minute he could with me, making me believe I was special. We were official for a couple of months, until I walked in on him being particularly friendly with a groupie after a concert in Hamburg. We then had an off again, on again relationship that lasted for over a year until I ended it, partly pressured by Cynthia. My relationship with Adrian tested me, my career and my friendship with Cynthia. Luckily, all of it survived this and came out stronger in the end.

Cynthia hated the time until I officially ended it with Adrian and I stopped taking his calls or attending their concerts. She was unhappy back then because I quit her magazine to pursue the foolish girl dream of having my bad boy. And he broke my heart.

She was unhappy now because I was repeating the same thing. I tried to explain it’s not exactly the same since this time I have a job, not to mention my name was known in the business and many magazines would offer me a job if they knew I was looking for one. But looking back at this, she had every right to be unhappy and bitch at me. Cynthia knew full well this job I was taking was only available until me and Dany got tired of each other.

“Look, I know what happened with Adrian and you know I learned my lesson. Maybe Dany isn’t as bad as you think him to be, ma– “

“Are you out of your mind, An? He’s a rock star! Just because you want him to be your rock star that he’ll be different than Adrian or any of the rock star boyfriends I’ve had!”

Few hours later, I found myself walking out of the hotel and climbing into a silver car that waited for me outside. I was alone with myself for the first time in the past few days and I couldn’t stop hearing Cynthia’s words in my head. At some point I realized I still had to call Ron and tell him I quit and in my mind I started playing out how our conversation would go. Every each way I played it out, Ron was shouting at me over the phone, repeating what Cynthia had been saying to me over the past hours.

My head felt overcrowded, overfilled with people’s words and judgment. I got my phone out and dialed Jayden’s number.

01.06.2013

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